Ranking All 103 Britney Spears Songs: #81-103

And so it begins...

For those who missed today’s earlier post, let me quickly explain this project again.

In advance of Sunday’s Britney Spears concert in Las Vegas, I’m going to be ranking every Britney Spears song of all-time, starting later tonight with #81-103.

After evaluating all my Britney albums -- including all international bonus tracks -- and some EPs and other randomness, I came up with a list of 103 songs. I didn’t count every single dance remix, nor any of the Pepsi commercials. If you think I missed a song, just shoot me a message about it, and either I’ll fix my rankings or explain why I left the song out.

So, let’s start at the bottom and work our way up to No. 1, which will be revealed on Saturday.

103. “Soda Pop” (“...Baby One More Time”)
Some song has to be her worst, and this is it. I called this song out as terrible in my review of “...Baby One More Time” back when it first came out, and 10 years hasn’t changed my opinion.

102. “Rock Boy” (“Circus”, digital bonus track)

101. “When I Found You” (“Britney”, iTunes Deluxe Edition)

100. “You Got It All” (“Oops!... I Did It Again”, European Edition)

99. “Before the Goodbye” (“Britney”, iTunes Deluxe Edition)

98. “Outta This World” (“Blackout”, Target Special Edition)

OK, at this point I feel the need to chime in. Sometimes “bonus track” is music industry code for “crap we didn’t think was good enough to make the cut for the album”. That happens a lot with Britney Spears, which is why so many of these are filling my bottom 20+. There are some good ones, and we get to them eventually.

97. “Over to You Now” (“Britney and Kevin: Chaotic”)
I hate everything that has to do with Kevin Federline.

96. “Quicksand” (“Circus”, European iTunes Edition)

95. “Don’t Hang Up” (“In The Zone” DVD Exclusive)

94. “I Will Be There” (“...Baby One More Time”)
There’s a lot of crap from Britney’s early albums hanging out down here. Some of the stuff before she got control of her own career is pretty bad.

93. “The Answer” (“In The Zone” DVD Exclusive)
Apparently I’m not a fan of the music CD that was packaged with the “In The Zone” DVD. I can see why these songs were cut from an otherwise strong album.

92. “Dear Diary” (“Oops!... I Did It Again”)
Do 19-year-old girls still keep diaries? And even if they did, would they sound like 12-year-olds? Note: this is my lowest-ranked song from the standard edition of “Oops!... I Did It Again”.

91. “Why Should I Be Sad” (“Blackout”)
I’d call it an automatic skip, but it’s the last song of the album, so it’s more like an automatic stop. Note: this is my lowest-ranked song from the standard edition of “Blackout”.

90. “Walk On By” (“Oops!... I Did It Again”, Australian Edition)

89. “Chaotic” (“Britney and Kevin: Chaotic”)

88. E-Mail My Heart (“...Baby One More Time”)
This is pretty much the line of demarcation between songs I dislike (89 and lower) and songs I’m just not crazy about (starting with 88). When we hit the next line, I’ll be sure to let you know. As for this song itself, it’s actually sweet, but the title is so cheesy, it’s hard to get past that.

87. “My Baby” (“Circus”)
Note: this is my lowest-ranked song from the standard edition of “Circus”.

86. “Heart” (“Oops!... I Did It Again”, European edition)

85. “Thinkin’ About You” (“...Baby One More Time”)

84.“The Hook Up” (“In The Zone”)
Note: this is my lowest-ranked song from the standard edition of “In The Zone”.

83. “Amnesia” (“Circus”, Britney.com bonus track)
With all the digital version, international versions and deluxe editions, there are 19 tracks on “Circus”, not counting the two remixes on “Womanizer”. That might be just a bit too many.

82. “Girl in the Mirror” (“Oops!... I Did It Again”, European edition)

81. “I Will Still Love You” (“...Baby One More Time”
This is a duet with Don Phillip. Who is Don Phillip? I bet Britney Spears would respond with that same question if you told her she did a duet with Don Phillip.