Fave 5 - Falcons #7 Jerseys

Michael Vick is in some state of NFL limbo, not officially suspended, but not allowed to attend Falcons camp. Now, I’m not here to pass judgment on Vick, or declare my support for him. I’m here to be funny. It’s kind of what I do.

Currently, you cannot purchase a Falcons Michael Vick jersey from NFL.com, or any authorized NFL reseller. Nor can you customize a Falcons jersey with VICK and the number 7. That makes my Vick jersey, pictured to the left, something of a rarity these days (plus, it’s just a freakin’ cool looking jersey. I really like the Falcons look). Too bad I can’t wear this jersey now without people thinking I’m making a political statement of some kind.


So what’s a person to do? Well, you still an’t get a #7 jersey that says “Mexico” (Vick’s 1st alleged alias) or “Ookie” (the name linked to Vick in the current indictment). But you can get any one of the following 5 jerseys, all of which can still be customized at NFL.com:


5. BAD NEWZ
Rep Vick’s hometown of Newport News, VA and support his alleged dog kennel all at once. Plus, by spelling the word “news” with a Z, you add to your all-important street cred, which is really everything in a situation like this.


4. INDICTED
This is a nice choice for the person who wants to show he’s up on current events but doesn’t want to take a stand. You’re not taking a side in the case, you’re just stating a fact: Michael Vick has been Indicted. That doesn’t imply guilt or innocence, it’s just his current legal status. Hey, it could be worse for Vick. It could say “INTERCEPTED” (also a valid choice on NFL.com).


3. GOINGTOJAIL
No question about where you stand on Vick when you rock this one. Sure, there are no spaces between the words, but that’s what gets this one past NFL.com’s filters, which are being upgraded every day (of note: NOT GUILTY was an acceptable customization on Tuesday, but now shows up on the banned list).


2. DAWG KILLA
Probably the one on this list most likely to get something thrown at you. Falcons fans won’t like you because you’re implying that Vick is guilty. PETA won’t like you because they’ll think you’re supporting Vick. English teachers of America won’t like you because you can’t spell. It’s a bad choice all around (but damn funny).


1. I LIKE CATS
This one really says it all. Why did Vick allegedly kill dogs? Because he likes cats. And when you wear it, you send the message that you’re an animal lover, too. Just a very specific animal. Plus, while people will make assumptions, the jersey says nothing specifically about disliking dogs. It just says that you like cats. Nothing wrong with that, right?

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